LOL Scouts Inc.

In the ultimate act of football treason, expect Jason Peters to run out onto the field and help the Falcons block Trent Cole.

I made fun of Scouts Inc’s Top 200 players a couple weeks ago, but today they came out with their Week 2 “complete advance scouting report” (you actually have to pay for this, mind you) on the Eagles-Falcons game.  Included was this gem:

5. Matchup to watch: Atlanta OT Jason Peters vs. Philadelphia DE Trent Cole: The Eagles are excellent at pressuring the quarterback, and Cole has been the leader in that category over the past two seasons. He has explosive quickness and deceptive power coming off the edge. Peters has outstanding size and athleticism for the tackle position and utilizes consistent technique to keep his opponent at bay. Look for this battle on the edge to be extremely intense between to athletes use to performing at a high level.

Just… wow.

H/t to BtB reader Seth, who emailed this to me.

16 Comments

  1. packimop says:

    Swing and a miss.

  2. Euler.is.a.pimp says:

    In their defense, it would be fun to see those two lined against each other in live action.

    1. Saw it at Lehigh. Peters usually wins.

      1. Euler.is.a.pimp says:

        Lies!

  3. ICDogg says:

    Heh… they’ll probably rag on you for reprinting their pay content

  4. cwel87 says:

    One word: E$PN.

    Dumbasses.

  5. ATLEagle says:

    This is like horoscopes. You just write a few , then rotate them through all the positions. No one will notice that the same description has been used multiple times as they only read about their guys.

  6. Steve D. says:

    This is truly hilarious.

  7. Derek Bodner says:

    Don’t forget the grammatical mistakes (“between to athletes use to performing at a high level)

  8. Jeff h says:

    The descriptions given would fit any de and any dt in the league. They couldn’t even fill in the “player’s name goes here” spot correctly.

  9. Jay Walker (GIB) says:

    Maybe they’re trying to say that the Eagles are so good, that they can only be beaten by themselves.

    1. cwel87 says:

      Scouts, INC isn’t intelligent enough to understand why the Eagles are good. They only know there hasn’t been enough jelling!

  10. GMENHQ says:

    So, other than the typo, obvious comparisons, and the lack of analysis — what do you pay for exactly?

    1. Ha, the funny thing is… I’m not even sure it’s a typo. Peters and Cole are mentioned twice (in the headline AND in the body). And the basic descriptions of both players are accurate.

      1. Gary says:

        I think he might be talking about the last line. They use the wrong form of to/two haha

      2. Gary says:

        And it should be “used” not “use.”

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